Toys That Rock: Opening Acts

Cape by Batman. baldric and sash by Captain Jack Sparrow. Headless five string bass by KISS. Anthropomorphization by the mutagen ooze.
Dragon sports a late ’50s rockabilly hollow body, while Black Manta rocks a custom Flying-V I like to call “The Nuge.”
Givin’ it up for Lucifer.
I call this guitar “Who-Dey.” It’s pretty much my favorite of all the toy guitars I own. That last sentence makes me sad.
Classic pose in tribute to the King of Rock ‘n’ Roll.
“Thank you, Cleveland! Good night!”

Winning

I’m happy to report that although I am almost certain to die alone, when I die I will die with more toys than ANY of you.

Seriously, I could literally not move from this spot and still reach at least 20 different toys. And that’s not including all my video games. It’s ridiculous. I’m like a giant 8 year old. No wonder I can’t keep a woman.

If I get up and take one single step, I can actually get a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. And not a new one.

Chris reviews the Crayola Crayon Maker

It can’t be on the site if its not sci-fi or fantasy. That’s the rule. Its my rule. What kind of asshole goes around breaking his own rule? I can’t. I won’t. Somehow I will justify reviewing this damn thing. I can’t think of any way I can do it right now, but I’m hoping if I just keep writing, something will come to me. ‘Cause, damn, brother, this thing is CHOICE. 

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