You ever feel like the whole universe is just fucking with you? Never even once in my life have I had a reason nor occasion to correspond with The Weather Channel in any capacity whatsoever. I don’t watch The Weather Channel. I’ve never heard of Jim Cantore, nor could I name any employee, past nor present, of The Weather Channel. I don’t even have cable. Yet, waiting at home, correctly addressed to me personally, I found this when I got home from work. It took a perfectly shitty day and added a varnish of inexplicable weirdness. I have no words. I am very interested to know how The goddamned Weather Channel even knows of my existence, let alone has mistaken me for a loyal supporter.