Get your geek on.
Chris doesn’t have kids. This is what happens when other people give him theirs.
Babysitting question: I need to have the following conversation professionally evaluated to determine if one or both of us has had a stroke. Is there a neurologist reading this who can provide a diagnosis? Alternately, it could just be that my beautiful little five year old niece is straight up gaslighting me.
ME: Is that Gekko?
HER: No, that’s Greg.
ME: Does he turn into Gekko?
HER: No.
ME: Who does Greg turn into?
HER: I don’t know.
ME: Then what is Gekko’s name?
HER: Greg.
Babysitting question: how much Taste Of The Wild High Prairie grain-free dog food can a ten month old human ingest before medical attention becomes necessary? Same question about a dog and Kroger Italian style supreme pizza. #weareallfinehere #undercontrol
I watched my niece unsupervised for five straight days and she’s still alive. Mark and Jon calculated the risk and rolled the dice. I’m only watching two of their three kids, so if the worst happens, they still have a backup. Besides, I’m only assisting. Their grandmother is here.
Follow up babysitting question: how much dog food does a standard size dog bowl hold? The bag says it has bison in it, which means that technically she ate a healthier meal than I did. The dog has been seriously on my nerves all night so I really don’t care if it dies. But I’m kind of attached to the little human.
Update: She is happy and sound asleep. Apparently bison has both soporific and antidepressant effects on toddlers.
Literature advice from Uncle Christopher: Some books improve with successive readings. Little Miss Muffet and Olivia Goes To The Library are NOT among them.