My friend Amanda had never seen a whole Star Wars film. When I asked her if she wanted to watch the original trilogy she said that she would, but that she already knew what happens. So I took out my voice recorder and asked her to start from the top.

Oh well.
SCHAWIING!!!

http://scifiwire.com/2009/03/confirmed-scarlett-johans.php

Anyway… here’s a bit of non-elf Marvel news for you.

We knew it was all too good to be true! Marvel Studios originally announced back in May of 2008 that Iron Man 2 and Thor would both be out in the summer of 2010 and that The First Avenger: Captain America and the highly anticipated Avengers movie would follow in 2011, but that schedule was just a bit too ambitious. Marvel has announced today that Thor has been delayed until June 17th, 2011 and that The First Avenger: Captain America has been pushed until July 22nd, 2011 to account for that change. Additionally, The Avengers has been delayed until May 4th, 2012, a complete 31 months from now.

“This new schedule strongly sequences Marvel’s movie debut dates, big screen character introductions and momentum. It maximizes the visibility of our single character-focused films, leading to the highly anticipated release of the multi-character The Avengers film in 2012,” said David Maisel, Chairman, Marvel Studios. It’s a bit baffling to think that it’ll be nearly 3 years until we see The Avengers, but it’ll be worth the wait, I’m sure. That’s the big crossover movie everyone is waiting to see and it’s best that they take their time on it. Marvel also confirmed that Sony is still releasing Spider-Man 4 on May 6th, 2011 as well.

We look at that article about a foreign belief and we recognize that its absolutely moronic. Completely fucking idiotic. As a matter of fact, that’s why the article was written. Everything about the tone suggests the author knows exactly how this will be received and agrees. The article might as well be titled “Foreign Retards Believe In Invisible Elves.”

Now, read it again and replace the word ‘elf’ with ‘angel,’ and replace ‘psychic powers’ with ‘faith.’ Sound familiar? If a Christian said that to you you’d never tell them it was nuts, because we’re trained not to. From an early age we’re taught that religion is off limits as far as debate is concerned. So we, as a nation, just sit by and say idiotic things like “Well, you’ve got to respect other peoples’ faiths” and “There’s lots of different points of view” and pretty much anything else you have to to allow yourself to rationalize the existence of such people. Saying that shit makes us feel open minded and noble and, more importantly to most people, helps us to avoid uncomfortable conflict, because we are a nation of intellectual and ethical pussies.

And then, before you know it, all the bullshit hands-off approach to dealing with zealots has resulted in the existence of places like Liberty University, which is, inexplicably, a fucking accredited school, where people earn legitimate Ph.D.s for promoting shit like this, and there are field trips to internationally reknown museums and centers of learning where idiotic assholes are encouraged to ridicule CENTURIES OF VALIDATED SCIENTIFIC DISCOVERY because they believe in invisible elves gods and angels that you can only see with psychic powers faith. And religious people control what teachers can teach in public schools, and high school kids no longer have any idea how evolution works, and all of a sudden you live in a country that used to be #1 in the world as far as education was concerned, but over the last 20 years has fallen to at least #9 and is still dropping rapidly, even though we spend the second most on education per student in the world. But that’s okay, because you’ve got to respect other peoples’ religions. No way you can ever stand up to someone and tell them they’re an idiot. God forbid.

Anyone who believes in a literal interpretation of the Genesis account of the bible is a straight up wackado, or in the words of Lewis Black: STONE COLD FUCK NUTS!

The scientific evidence is overwhelmingly against you. But that doesn’t matter because you have faith. And that allows you to rationalize, well anything, to fit into your narrow little view of the world.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29628516/

Elf Detection 101
How to find the hidden folk of Iceland.

An article on Iceland’s de facto bankruptcy in the April issue of Vanity Fair notes that a “large number of Icelanders” believe in elves or “hidden people.” This widespread folklore occasionally disrupts business in the sparsely populated North Atlantic country. Before the aluminum company Alcoa could erect a smelting factory, “it had to defer to a government expert to scour the enclosed plant site and certify that no elves were on or under it.” How do you find an elf?

http://www.slate.com/id/2213353/?GT1=38001

We’re only two months out from the much anticipated Star Trek reboot. And like all good summer releases, this one will be getting a licensed game to go with it. Get ready for Star Trek D.A.C — whatever “D.A.C” might happen to mean.

The new title hasn’t been officially announced, but a promotional insert can be found in the Blu-ray release of Star Trek Season One, which will be coming out April 28th. Paramount recently released the artwork for the insert, which TrekMovie.com (via Kotaku) promptly posted for all to see. Development is being handle by Naked Sky Entertainment, which lists an unnamed PlayStation Network/Xbox Live Arcade game as being one of their projects. Star Trek fans, get ready to start downloading in earnest.

Unfortunately, Star Trek games don’t exactly have a sterling reputation. Going back over their long history, only Interplay’s Star Trek: 25th Anniversary and Judgement Rites for PC stand out in my mind as being truly great. The rest of them constitute a light smattering of the good amid the truly wretched. With luck though, the upcoming game will prove to be as much a reboot as the movie.

http://store.glennz.com/callforhelp.html