Action Figure Makeover: The Thing
Today's article is brought to us by the lovely and talented Miss Victoria Whitby, better known to the internet as Mystie, who rules over the magical realm of Crown Combo with a firm but benevolent hand. Mystie is a Berks County, Pennsylvania native, international lady of mystery, world renown raconteur, New York Times bestselling author of Sex, Leather, Candy and Pain: The Unauthorized Biography Of Funshine Bear, and inventor of the award winning Mystaphalon non-stick cookware. In her spare time she enjoys reading, quiet nude walks on non-nude beaches, and Action Figure Makeovers™, where she takes boys’ toys and girly-izes them with pink nail polish and glitter. Today's victim: The Thing.
I first became aware of Mystie's formidable skills in the dark art of turning action figures gay when I stumbled across her fabulously glam redeco of Optimus Prime. Soon I discovered she had cast her spell on other toys. Toys such as Strawberry Milkshake Skeletor,
Gothed-Up Vinyl Fetish April O'Neil,
and of course Wizard Bunny Vader.
As is so often the case when I come across a great new talent, I sit back and ponder to myself "How can I take this person's creativity and drive and twist it to my own selfish ends so that I might benefit from their hard work and inspiration while sitting on my fat ass and doing pretty much nothing?" The answer was obvious: I'd have to find a way to make her do sci-fi/fantasy figures so that I could post her work here on The Sci-Fi Guys. And then I laughed, long and loud, as my twisted evil plans unfurled themselves in my brain, and the lighting stuck, and the thunder boomed, and the winds blew like the breath of the Devil himself, rattling the centuries old windows of the haunted castle that rests atop the long forgotten crypts and catacombs which serve as my secret lair here on Skullcrusher Mountain.
And life was good.
A while back I got in touch with Mystie and set my plans in motion. She was like putty in my fingers, and agreed to paint some sci-fi figures to be used on The Sci-Fi Guys. Fool! She played right into my hands! I would have free fodder for articles and I wouldn't have to lift a finger! All I had to do was buy a bunch of action figures and then pay to have them shipped to Pennsylvania. To her. Where she will receive them. For free…
I never gave much though to our arrangement until I just typed that last sentence. It now occurs to me that while I may be an evil genius, its possible that I'm not particularly good at it. I don't think this deal is working out for me. As a matter of fact, the more I think about it, is it possible that… could it be… is she the one who's…
Curses! Fooled again! But the last laugh's on you, my dear. I sent you loose figures! They were already opened, played with, used, far from mint on a card that wasn't even there. Your Skeletor article clearly states "I have a disliking for getting loose figures because I forfeit all the gratification of tearing the box apart myself." Some people might mistake the fact that I sent you a box full of opened Destro, Terminator, Fantastic Four, and King Kong figures to mean that I probably just didn't read very closely before I sent the box, seeing as how I think there were only two boxed figures in the entire package. Some people might mistake that to mean that I was not attentive or perhaps that my memory and/or reading comprehension is lacking in the extreme. But the joke's on you, sweetcakes. Because you opened 'em! And now you're stuck with 'em! A bunch of used toys. That you didn't have to pay for. Delivered right to your door. To play with. And to decorate. And befriend.
For free…
Damn it. My evil plans always fuckin' suck. I'm a shitty villain. Whatever; you win, I lose, no world domination or victory for me, blah, blah, blah. At least I still got a secret lair on Skullcrusher Mountian. Where I live. Alone. Without a girlfriend. With a lot less action figures than I used to have. And there's no cable and the TV reception sucks. Here's Mystie:
Inspiration comes from all sorts of sources, and when it sets in at a young age it can effect how we live the rest of our lives. One boy might see E.T. in his youth and grow up to be an expert in exobiology where as the rest of us just grow an affection for Reese's Pieces. While hoardes of gamers piddle away battling their Warhammer figures, I see nothing but armies upon armies of pink and purple warriors riding atop pipecleaner-horned unicorns with sparkling gem saddles. When I see Sandman I want nothing more than to dye him various colors and layer him into oddly shaped bottles.
Where most people see The Thing and think nothing more than, "IT'S CLOBBERIN' TIME!" I see a makeover waiting to happen. Granted, there isn't much to work with, but I love a challenge — especially one that could involve glitter. While there weren't a lot of accessories to paint over, the texture of the skin made it slightly difficult to paint and covered more surface space than I initially thought. I decided to kick the dull Sunny D orange up a notch to a more spitfire color like coral.
It's amazing how a fresh coat of paint can cause such a drastic change. In a way this is the equivilent of going from having long, dark, ravenesque hair to a bright red bob. I thought the effect would appear more subtle, but side by side it's a hearty difference. Not as hearty had I sanded him down, painted him green, and turned him into a Hulk figure, but more like a homestyle beef stew hearty. Now that I had tossed the chunks of sirloin into the pot, it was time to chop the carrots and onions.
After the base I went for the hot pants, changing them into a nice hot pink with a silver belt trim. I find the small 1/8 oz Bon Bons nail polish perfect for detail work. I debated making some additional clothes for The Thing — perhaps a snazzy little vest or sash, but instead I broke out the big gun for this one. The hot glue gun, to be precise.
I forged a pair of wings out of craft foam and topped it off with a pipe cleaner tiara all attatched with burning hot glue. As a final touch, I added some bling gems to the belt to form a shiny pink buckle and topped off the wings and tiara combo as well. Despite the flamboyance, The Thing still seems relatively emo, but at least he looks good.
I'm really digging my Florescent Fairy Thing. He reminds me of a bumpy gay Icarus.
June 6th, 2008 at 7:20 pm
HIDDEN!
Artist: Stan Bush
Album: The Transformers: The Movie - Original Motion Picture Soundtrack, 1986
HIDDEN!
June 6th, 2008 at 7:21 pm
June 6th, 2008 at 9:18 pm
Are you sure your are not gay?
June 6th, 2008 at 11:12 pm
I’m pretty sure, but I’m no doctor. What are the symptoms?
June 9th, 2008 at 11:48 am
Bro,
I know that at some point in your life you will own that “fabulously glam redeco of Optimus Prime.”
One more comment - Wizard Bunny Vader… what in the hell is this world coming to?!?!
Peace,
Frog Boy
June 9th, 2008 at 3:06 pm
Actually, I don’t think its for sale. That’s a one of a kind, and if you click on Fab Glam Prime and read Mystie’s article, it sounds like she’s pretty enamored with it. I don’t think she’s gonna give it up.
Wizard Bunny Vader is also unavailable, but not because she won’t sell it. He was unfortunately destroyed. Here’s the rundown of our correspondence regarding his demise:
You see? It’s not just what I write here, folks. I’m like this with everybody. There’s a reason I’m single, make no mistake.
June 10th, 2008 at 4:28 pm
What Kind of D&D Character Would You Be?
This is probably the most thorough online quiz I’ve ever taken. This was VERY well done. And, although I did not expect the character class I got (I answered completely honestly instead of slanting my answers to produce a desired outcome), I am very pleased with the results. I think I’d be a good Ranger/Bard. I might just quit my job and check into it.
I Am A: Neutral Good Human Ranger/Bard (3rd/2nd Level)
Ability Scores:
Strength-11
Dexterity-12
Constitution-12
Intelligence-18
Wisdom-14
Charisma-15
Alignment:
Neutral Good A neutral good character does the best that a good person can do. He is devoted to helping others. He works with kings and magistrates but does not feel beholden to them. Neutral good is the best alignment you can be because it means doing what is good without bias for or against order. However, neutral good can be a dangerous alignment because it advances mediocrity by limiting the actions of the truly capable.
Race:
Humans are the most adaptable of the common races. Short generations and a penchant for migration and conquest have made them physically diverse as well. Humans are often unorthodox in their dress, sporting unusual hairstyles, fanciful clothes, tattoos, and the like.
Primary Class:
Rangers are skilled stalkers and hunters who make their home in the woods. Their martial skill is nearly the equal of the fighter, but they lack the latter’s dedication to the craft of fighting. Instead, the ranger focuses his skills and training on a specific enemy a type of creature he bears a vengeful grudge against and hunts above all others. Rangers often accept the role of protector, aiding those who live in or travel through the woods. His skills allow him to move quietly and stick to the shadows, especially in natural settings, and he also has special knowledge of certain types of creatures. Finally, an experienced ranger has such a tie to nature that he can actually draw on natural power to cast divine spells, much as a druid does, and like a druid he is often accompanied by animal companions. A ranger’s Wisdom score should be high, as this determines the maximum spell level that he can cast.
Secondary Class:
Bards often serve as negotiators, messengers, scouts, and spies. They love to accompany heroes (and villains) to witness heroic (or villainous) deeds firsthand, since a bard who can tell a story from personal experience earns renown among his fellows. A bard casts arcane spells without any advance preparation, much like a sorcerer. Bards also share some specialized skills with rogues, and their knowledge of item lore is nearly unmatched. A high Charisma score allows a bard to cast high-level spells.
Find out What Kind of Dungeons and Dragons Character Would You Be?, courtesy of Easydamus (e-mail)
June 10th, 2008 at 4:44 pm
Awesome.
June 10th, 2008 at 8:30 pm
hmmm……interesting…….
My results:
True Neutral Human Ranger/Wizard (2nd/2nd Level)
Ability Scores:
Strength- 12
Dexterity- 12
Constitution- 12
Intelligence- 14
Wisdom- 15
Charisma- 12
Alignment:
True Neutral- A true neutral character does what seems to be a good idea. He doesn’t feel strongly one way or the other when it comes to good vs. evil or law vs. chaos. Most true neutral characters exhibit a lack of conviction or bias rather than a commitment to neutrality. Such a character thinks of good as better than evil after all, he would rather have good neighbors and rulers than evil ones. Still, he’s not personally committed to upholding good in any abstract or universal way. Some true neutral characters, on the other hand, commit themselves philosophically to neutrality. They see good, evil, law, and chaos as prejudices and dangerous extremes. They advocate the middle way of neutrality as the best, most balanced road in the long run. True neutral is the best alignment you can be because it means you act naturally, without prejudice or compulsion. However, true neutral can be a dangerous alignment because it represents apathy, indifference, and a lack of conviction.
Race:
Humans are the most adaptable of the common races. Short generations and a penchant for migration and conquest have made them physically diverse as well. Humans are often unorthodox in their dress, sporting unusual hairstyles, fanciful clothes, tattoos, and the like.
Primary Class:
Rangers- Rangers are skilled stalkers and hunters who make their home in the woods. Their martial skill is nearly the equal of the fighter, but they lack the latter’s dedication to the craft of fighting. Instead, the ranger focuses his skills and training on a specific enemy a type of creature he bears a vengeful grudge against and hunts above all others. Rangers often accept the role of protector, aiding those who live in or travel through the woods. His skills allow him to move quietly and stick to the shadows, especially in natural settings, and he also has special knowledge of certain types of creatures. Finally, an experienced ranger has such a tie to nature that he can actually draw on natural power to cast divine spells, much as a druid does, and like a druid he is often accompanied by animal companions. A ranger’s Wisdom score should be high, as this determines the maximum spell level that he can cast.
Secondary Class:
Wizards- Wizards are arcane spellcasters who depend on intensive study to create their magic. To wizards, magic is not a talent but a difficult, rewarding art. When they are prepared for battle, wizards can use their spells to devastating effect. When caught by surprise, they are vulnerable. The wizard’s strength is her spells, everything else is secondary. She learns new spells as she experiments and grows in experience, and she can also learn them from other wizards. In addition, over time a wizard learns to manipulate her spells so they go farther, work better, or are improved in some other way. A wizard can call a familiar- a small, magical, animal companion that serves her. With a high Intelligence, wizards are capable of casting very high levels of spells.
June 11th, 2008 at 9:33 am
Two rangers on the same TV show? The Sci-Fi Guys will rule the forests of Fangorn!
Sweet Jesus, I can’t believe I typed that. Oh, man, I am a fucking NERD. I’m never going to get to have sex ever again.
June 11th, 2008 at 11:12 am
Yup. I think that ranger comment pretty much clinched it
June 11th, 2008 at 11:16 am
June 11th, 2008 at 11:17 am
Too bad I don’t have a blu-ray player.
June 12th, 2008 at 11:45 am
Here’s a super nerdy idea. For one of our future D&D sessions, each of us should have to play the character generated by the test above.
June 12th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
I’ve had that exact same thought. But now that you’ve said it there’s no way in hell Mark won’t totally slant his answers to make his character a 30th level supermage druid treehugger with 50 familiars and a mystical link to the Demiplane Of New Age Homosexual Unicorn Fairies.
June 12th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
Anybody up for some Tic-Tac-Toe? Saw this over at X-E courtesy of JoshC and thought it was a pretty cool way to play. I’ll start.
- - -
- - -
- X -
June 13th, 2008 at 9:26 am
Nobody loves me.
Guess I’ll have to play all by myself. 
- O -
- - -
- X -
June 13th, 2008 at 9:27 am
- O -
- - -
- X X
June 13th, 2008 at 9:27 am
- O -
- - -
O X X
June 13th, 2008 at 9:28 am
- O -
- X -
O X X
June 13th, 2008 at 9:28 am
O O -
- X -
O X X
June 13th, 2008 at 9:31 am
O O X
- X -
O X X
June 13th, 2008 at 9:31 am
O O X
O X -
O X X
I WIN!!
June 13th, 2008 at 9:57 am
OMFG!!! We're all gonna die!!!
June 16th, 2008 at 12:26 pm
June 16th, 2008 at 1:59 pm
Pimpin’ ain’t easy, but it’s necess-BAM!
Ancient Asian martial arts - 1
Pimp style backhand - 0
June 16th, 2008 at 7:52 pm
Wow. I’d better keep a closer eye on my wife.
T.H.O. Girl is:
Chaotic Neutral Human Fighter/Rogue (3rd/2nd Level)
Ability Scores:
Strength- 11
Dexterity- 11
Constitution- 11
Intelligence- 12
Wisdom- 13
Charisma- 14
Alignment:
Chaotic Neutral- A chaotic neutral character follows his whims. He is an individualist first and last. He values his own liberty but doesn’t strive to protect others’ freedom. He avoids authority, resents restrictions, and challenges traditions. A chaotic neutral character does not intentionally disrupt organizations as part of a campaign of anarchy. To do so, he would have to be motivated either by good (and a desire to liberate others) or evil (and a desire to make those different from himself suffer). A chaotic neutral character may be unpredictable, but his behavior is not totally random. He is not as likely to jump off a bridge as to cross it. Chaotic neutral is the best alignment you can be because it represents true freedom from both society’s restrictions and a do-gooder’s zeal. However, chaotic neutral can be a dangerous alignment because it seeks to eliminate all authority, harmony, and order in society.
Race:
Humans are the most adaptable of the common races. Short generations and a penchant for migration and conquest have made them physically diverse as well. Humans are often unorthodox in their dress, sporting unusual hairstyles, fanciful clothes, tattoos, and the like.
Primary Class:
Fighters- Fighters can be many things, from soldiers to criminal enforcers. Some see adventure as a way to get rich, while others use their skills to protect the innocent. Fighters have the best all-around fighting capabilities of the PC classes, and they are trained to use all standard weapons and armor. A fighter’s rigorous martial training grants him many bonus feats as he progresses, and high-level fighters have access to special melee maneuvers and exotic weapons not available to any other character.
Secondary Class:
Rogues- Rogues have little in common with each other. While some - maybe even the majority - are stealthy thieves, many serve as scouts, spies, investigators, diplomats, and simple thugs. Rogues are versatile, adaptable, and skilled at getting what others don’t want them to get. While not equal to a fighter in combat, a rogue knows how to hit where it hurts, and a sneak attack can dish out a lot of damage. Rogues also seem to have a sixth sense when it comes to avoiding danger. Experienced rogues develop nearly magical powers and skills as they master the arts of stealth, evasion, and sneak attacks. In addition, while not capable of casting spells on their own, a rogue can sometimes ‘fake it’ well enough to cast spells from scrolls, activate wands, and use just about any other magic item.
June 16th, 2008 at 8:38 pm
Here’s my character.
You Are A:
Lawful Good Human Wizard/Sorcerer (2nd/2nd Level)
Ability Scores:
Strength- 10
Dexterity- 10
Constitution- 9
Intelligence- 14
Wisdom- 12
Charisma- 13
Alignment:
Lawful Good- A lawful good character acts as a good person is expected or required to act. He combines a commitment to oppose evil with the discipline to fight relentlessly. He tells the truth, keeps his word, helps those in need, and speaks out against injustice. A lawful good character hates to see the guilty go unpunished. Lawful good is the best alignment you can be because it combines honor and compassion. However, lawful good can be a dangerous alignment because it restricts freedom and criminalizes self-interest.
Race:
Humans are the most adaptable of the common races. Short generations and a penchant for migration and conquest have made them physically diverse as well. Humans are often unorthodox in their dress, sporting unusual hairstyles, fanciful clothes, tattoos, and the like.
Primary Class:
Wizards- Wizards are arcane spellcasters who depend on intensive study to create their magic. To wizards, magic is not a talent but a difficult, rewarding art. When they are prepared for battle, wizards can use their spells to devastating effect. When caught by surprise, they are vulnerable. The wizard’s strength is her spells, everything else is secondary. She learns new spells as she experiments and grows in experience, and she can also learn them from other wizards. In addition, over time a wizard learns to manipulate her spells so they go farther, work better, or are improved in some other way. A wizard can call a familiar- a small, magical, animal companion that serves her. With a high Intelligence, wizards are capable of casting very high levels of spells.
Secondary Class:
Sorcerers- Sorcerers are arcane spellcasters who manipulate magic energy with imagination and talent rather than studious discipline. They have no books, no mentors, no theories just raw power that they direct at will. Sorcerers know fewer spells than wizards do and acquire them more slowly, but they can cast individual spells more often and have no need to prepare their incantations ahead of time. Also unlike wizards, sorcerers cannot specialize in a school of magic. Since sorcerers gain their powers without undergoing the years of rigorous study that wizards go through, they have more time to learn fighting skills and are proficient with simple weapons. Charisma is very important for sorcerers; the higher their value in this ability, the higher the spell level they can cast.
——————————————————————————–
June 17th, 2008 at 11:45 am
June 17th, 2008 at 11:52 am
Mark is Lawful Good?
I think Hell just froze over
June 17th, 2008 at 1:33 pm
That is truly shitty news. Stan Winston was the man. He designed stuff for Terminator, Predator, Aliens, Star Wars, Pumpkinhead, Galaxy Quest, Edward Scissorhands, Iron Man, even the Mr. Roboto mask for Styx’s Kilroy Was Here album. What a cool guy. Hollywood just became a lot less special.
June 17th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
June 18th, 2008 at 9:40 am
some images just speak for themselves…
June 19th, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Dan’s incredibly short Incredible Hulk Review:
INCREDIBLE HULK SMASH PUNY HULK MOVIE!!!
June 20th, 2008 at 9:02 am
Sorry about the absenteeism peeps, but my huge Indiana Jones review is gonna have to wait. Sci-Fi Girl is in the hospital. The nurses tell me she’s gonna be fine, but Frog Boy, myself, and Ma & Pa Sci-Fi are keeping to her side as much as possible, and since I don’t have me no laptop, you don’t have you no review. I’ll get it up as soon as possible (that’s also a promise to the ladies). Until then, peace out.
June 20th, 2008 at 9:05 am
TOPFIVE.COM'S LITTLE FIVERS – SCIENCE FICTION
http://www.littlefivers.com/scifi
===========================
June 20, 2008
The Top 10 Signs Your School Board Is Run by Aliens
10> They just keep saying "Resistance to standardized testing is
futile!"
9> The board unanimously approves a measure to put kids in
detention on next week's cafeteria menu.
8> Demographic balance is maintained by busing kids to the Delta
Quadrant.
7> Out: Detention. In: Gom Jabbar box.
6> Turns out the substitute teachers really *do* have eyes in
the back of their heads.
5> The math text books have had several chapters added to include
the equations necessary for computing interstellar travel.
4> Hairstyles that cover the ears are banned, especially for
those succulent female earlobes.
3> The budget for astronomy class now includes a field trip.
2> Insists on holding their meetings in a Nitrogen-Chlorine
atmosphere.
and the Number 1 Sign Your School Board Is Run by Aliens…
1> Every day at band practice it's those same damn five notes
from "Close Encounters."
===========================
Selected from 40 submissions from 12 contributors.
This week's list authors are:
——————————
Donald Johnson, Cincinnati, OH — 1, 7
Tom Rodman, Durham, NC — 2
Bruce Kane, Charlotte, NC — 3
Dan Thompson, Austin, TX — 4
Chris Pulliam, San Dimas, CA — 5, 6, 9 (Hat trick!)
Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — 8, 10
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — Topic
Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC — SF List Moderator
[Copyright 2008 by Chris White. All rights reserved. Do not forward, publish, broadcast, or use in any manner without crediting "TopFive.com"]
===========================
June 20th, 2008 at 9:16 am
HIDDEN!
Artist: Sigue Sigue Sputnik
Album: Flaunt It, 1986
HIDDEN!
June 20th, 2008 at 11:58 am
I do not ask for much. However, I demand to see photos of Frog Boy baking with his blouse off.
Thank you in advance for your compliance.
June 20th, 2008 at 3:35 pm
We’ll get right on it.
June 23rd, 2008 at 5:36 am
June 23rd, 2008 at 11:27 am
My favorite comedian… there will never be another one like George.
George Denis Patrick Carlin
May 12, 1937 – June 22, 2008
“The reading of science fiction such as The Bible and giving it the standard of truth, I mean it’s just… it would be cartoonish if it weren’t dangerous to some people.”
“You have owners. They own you.”
The Planet Is Fine. The People Are Fucked.
“You wanna know how the planet’s doin’? Ask those people at Pompeii…”
Soft Language
Seven Dirty Words
Pro-Life Is Anti-Woman (Chickens Are Decent People)
“Not every ejaculation deserves a name.”
The Greatest Bullshit Story Ever Told
The Ten Commandments
June 23rd, 2008 at 11:30 am
new X FILES comment posted on the X Files thread. BE WARNED THAT SPOILERS are present. -LINK-
June 23rd, 2008 at 11:31 am
SuperheroHype reported that Michael Bay’s sequel film will drop the “2″ and be called Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen; it is currently shooting.
June 23rd, 2008 at 12:30 pm
Give Me Three!!!!
RIP George you will be missed.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_hhloCrA_8&feature=related
[embedding disabled]
Life Is A Series Of Dogs
June 23rd, 2008 at 12:51 pm
Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure is one of my all time favorites!!!!!!!!!!
June 23rd, 2008 at 12:55 pm
No real new spoiler revelations in that X-files post.
June 23rd, 2008 at 12:58 pm
Got to see him once in Vegas, doing new material I had never seen before or since. What a fucking cool guy. This bums me out, but his most recent HBO special was just released, so I’ve got an album and a DVD to look forward to. And if you’re into the printed word, you’d be insane not to read these books:
June 23rd, 2008 at 1:11 pm
Always loved him reading the headlines and it was “Police arrested a one armed man at the lake today. He was annoying the other boaters by continuoulsy rowing in a circle. ”
Have to agree Carlin was the best. Only person even close was Sam.
June 23rd, 2008 at 1:40 pm
You ever hear him do the Hippy Dippy Weatherman? First time I heard it I rolled. “Tonight’s forecast: dark. Continued dark throughout most of the evening, with some widely-scattered light towards morning.” Fucking classic.
June 23rd, 2008 at 11:30 pm
I told my dad about George Carlin last night and after he mourned he asked me if I had ever seen the Hippy Dippy Weatherman and had me look it up when I said no. Carlin was not just a comedian but a very insightful man with a unique perspective on things that benefited a lot of people. God speed, man.
A side tangent.. I found your site by searching for a picture of Storm and found your article where you reviewed fights of characters and I have to say that originally I was pretty mad that you thought Wonder Woman should win over her, but I kept reading. I thoroughly enjoy your site, and the real clincher was the crayon maker review and the color name contest. I’ve bookmarked this and my only regret is that I hadn’t found this sooner.
June 24th, 2008 at 9:44 am
Welcome to the site, taekwondogirl. Yeah, I have taken a lot of heat about chosing WW over Storm, and not just from our readers. I think Mark was fairly unhappy with that call as well.
George Carlin will be sorely missed, but thanks to the digital age his comedy is never going to go away. I love the fact that 20 years from now if I ever were to have kids that I could go to whatever will be the future equivalent of You Tube and we could watch him do stand up. Carlin is immortal; there can be only one!
If you dug the crayons, stick around, because I’ve got a sequel to that article coming up with even more crayons to be named. That robot that makes crayons I talked about is a very real thing, and I own it. And get this: IT MAKES ROBOTS OUT OF CRAYONS. No shit. Keep your eyes peeled, the review is on the way.
June 24th, 2008 at 12:42 pm
This excerpt from the World Of Warcraft forums is fairly cold-hearted, but I'd be lying my ass off if I said it didn't crack me up. Its exactly the kind of joke George Carlin would have made about his own death were he a gamer. Brief, ruthless, pointed and hilarious. Click to enlarge.
June 24th, 2008 at 1:19 pm
I’m going to have to find me a crayon robot making robot… and I look forward to seeing more crayons. :p
I’ve seen that screenshot a lot and I do think Carlin would appreciate the humor behind it. For some reason, I think I recall him saying that his death should be celebrated and people should throw a party. I’ll have to look for that.
June 24th, 2008 at 6:16 pm
Carlin talks about his own death in one of the clips above. Scroll up and check out “Soft Language.”
On a thoroughly unrelated note: I try not to get too political on this site, but Jesus fucking Christ. Is the kind of America we can expect if John McCain gets into office? This was his goddamn rally, and those people being drug off are OLD WOMEN. What were they doing, knitting in a menacing manner? Watching Matlock for Al-Quaeda? They were speaking out against a war that he said he wasn’t in favor of in the first place, and his goons had them arrested.
You know what? Fuck McCain. Vote for Obama. Voting for four years of McCain is like voting for four years of Stalin. It’s a really, really bad idea.
June 25th, 2008 at 12:08 pm
(I believe this was an Esquire Interview)
June 25th, 2008 at 2:54 pm
Don’t matter who you vote for the world is gonna end in 2012 anyway.
June 26th, 2008 at 9:13 am
Good point. Depressing, but good.
July 2nd, 2008 at 12:20 pm
This has nothing to do with the above topics, or the thread, but it does have to do with the X-files…..and it’s not even a spoiler.
I was reading an old interview with Gillian, David and Chris Carter from a 1996 copy of Rolling Stone and I found this quote from David I thought it was so funny I just had to post it.
What do you think when you see all the “X-Files” merchandise?
I think, “Here’s another thing I don’t get money from.”
I WANT TO BELIEVE IN THEATERS JULY 25TH!
July 4th, 2008 at 2:12 pm
That sounds exactly like something I’d expect him to say. I’ve always wondered if he’s kind of a dick or if he’s just a sarcastic bastard like myself. I’ve never seen any interviews where I could get a sense of what he’s like, but he comes off as very intelligent and cynical, so I’ve gotta like the guy. He reminds me of me. Just a lot better looking and rich.
Sorry about the lack of activity, peeps, but I’ve been on a stay-at-home vacation, a “stacation” as Mark put it. I worked last weekend, I’m at home this week, and I’m working again this weekend, so I’m all fucked up schedule-wise. Almost everything I’ve got in place to complete the Indiana Jones article is in the office. I considered going back in to work to finish it up, but then again FUCK THAT. I’ll get it published this week. Pinky swear.
July 7th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
UN-FUCKING-BELIEVABLE.
I guess the Constitution is considered “optional” in some states.
July 7th, 2008 at 12:39 pm
Oh, yes, FINALLY the Christians are going to fight for their rights for a change. Because Christians are so trodden upon in America. Just the other day I had a semi-urgent question about Christianity and I thought to myself “Man, it’s too bad we burned all the Bibles in this country and all the Christians have been forced into hiding for fear of going to concentration camps, because I really want to know what would Jesus do.” Good for you, Christians! Way to be proud of your faith!
July 7th, 2008 at 1:27 pm
Again *eye roll* world over 2012…….
July 7th, 2008 at 3:40 pm
hey….not cool man. you stole my article
July 7th, 2008 at 3:43 pm
Shit, I forgot to rename the tag to give you credit. There, it’s taken care of.
July 7th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
Don Sinclair Davis
August 4, 1942 - June 29, 2008
Man, this sucks. He was in bad health, which was why his cardiologist told him he needed to leave SG-1, so this isn't entirely unexpected. But nonetheless it sucks.
You may recall that Sci-Fi Girl and I got to meet Don and talk with him back in Episode 7. You only saw the stuff that we filmed in front of the audience, but he was exactly as warm and friendly when the cameras weren't rolling. Hours before what you saw on film, I was in the hotel in Chicago scouting out shots, when down the hall I spot Don S. Davis walking my way. He saw that I recognized him, and without me saying a word he walked over and shook my hand and asked me my name. It was like he was there to see me. None of this standing in line and paying for autographs bullshit, he came over to me and thanked me for watching. I've never experienced that with a celebrity either before or since. And when I mentioned that my little sister was a big fan, he walked over to her, shook her hand and gave her a big hug and thanked her, too.
What a hell of a guy. I've met a few celebrities over the course of my life, and with the possible exception of James Doohan, none of them have come anywhere close to being as friendly, approachable, and personalble as the Stargate SG-1 cast. These people are great, and meeting Don S. Davis was like meeting a grandfather you never knew you had. This is a big loss for me personally, and for all the Stargate fans out there. This guy was one in a million.
July 7th, 2008 at 5:37 pm
Fuck! Not Scully’s Dad! Although technically he was killed off in the episode Beyond the Sea, it still sucks.
July 7th, 2008 at 6:19 pm
He was in The X-Files, that’s right! I forgot all about that!
He’s done a lot over the years. The X-Files gig was after he made the switch from being a stuntman to getting more on-screen acting parts. Back in the day, long before they would work together on Stargate SG-1, he worked with Richard Dean Anderson on MacGyver as Dana Elcar’s stunt double (Dana Elcar played Pete, the head of the Phoenix Foundation). According to Wikipedia he also played two different characters on screen in MacGyver, but even though I used to watch that show a lot, I don’t remember him.
I wish you guys could have met him. When he talked to you it was like he had been waiting to talk to you and had known you forever. This guy was the definition of charisma, and none of it was bullshit, at least not that I could see. He was a genuinely cool guy, and 65 is too damn young to die nowadays. Take care of your hearts, people. Don should have been around for another 20 years.
Don’s final movie Stargate: Continuum will be released on DVD on July 29, 2008 here in the US. You guys in other parts of the world will have to wait a little bit longer. It’s his last appearance as Lt. Gen. George Hammond. Be sure to check it out.
July 9th, 2008 at 9:41 am
This is hilarious:
http://www.yesbutnobutyes.com/archives/2007/03/top_15_unintent.html