Chris’s note: You’re god damn right it could be wrong. It IS wrong. Bad spam bot! Bad!

Its not a reboot; J. J. Abrams has said he intends this story to take place within the confines of established Star Trek canon. He said he's doing this specifically out of respect for the millions of fans who love this material and have kept it alive for so long (George Lucas, are you listening?) Its also not re-imagined. The new Battlestar Galactica is re-imagined; probably the single best example of re-imagining any franchise, sci-fi or otherwise, that I have ever seen. But this is still Star Trek. Again, that's J. J. Abrams and writer Roberto Orci, a huge Trek fan, keepin' it real.

According to startrek.com the definition of "re-imagined" is that this will be the first Star Trek movie to have characters from the original series played by new actors. That's not "re-imagining," that's recasting. And its also not true. A lot of people from the original series have been recast over the years.

Mr. Spock is easily the most iconic Star Trek character ever. He's also, according to my research, the most recast Star Trek character ever. Leonard Nimoy, of course, played Spock in the original series, movies 1 though 6, the animated series, as a guest star on The Next Generation, and in the new movie being made right now. But he's not the only one to wear the pointy ears. I'll try to list them in the order they appeared:

Billy Simpson played a young Spock in the animated series 1973 episode "Yesteryear."

In Star Trek III: The Search For Spock the title character was portrayed by six different actors: Carl Steven plays 9 year old Spock, Vadia Potenza plays 13 year old Spock, Stephen Manley plays 17 year old Spock, Joe W. Davis plays 25 year old Spock, voice acting legend Frank Welker plays the off screen vocals of Spock's screams, and Leonard Nimoy finally returns to the role in the end.

In Star Trek V: The Final Frontier the newborn Spock was played by Carey Scott, and in the upcoming movie he will be played by Zachary Quinto. For those of you keeping score, that's a total of nine different actors who have played Spock over the years. This "re-imagining" definition is ridiculous; this movie is hardly the first to recast Spock. 

And Spock's not the only one to be recast before now. In the original series episode "Journey To Babel" and in Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, Spock's human mother, Amanda Grayson, was played by Jane Wyatt. Cynthia Blaise played Amanda in the flashback scene in Star Trek V: The Final Frontier, and Majel Barrett was the voice of Amanda in the animated series. Now Winona Ryder is in the role. I sure hope the wardrobe department has some of those department store security tags, because Winona's been known to steal shit. I'd hate for them to get halfway through filming this movie and suddenly realize all their costumes are gone. 

Speaking of theft, here’s Zachary Quinto getting advice from Jimmy Kimmel to steal everything from the set he can get his hands on.

I usually hate to make predictions like this. I’ve burned myself in the past, and I hate the taste of my own foot. But fuck it, here it is: in all honesty, I can’t wait. I think this movie is going to be HUGE. I think this movie is going to be so fucking good that it will pull in fans who would never have admitted to watching Star Trek, let alone paid money to see it. Based on Leonard Nimoy’s comments – who, by the way, is an excellent filmmaker who should have been given the chance to direct more than just the two Trek films he helmed – the script is one of the most solid he’s ever read, and fits in perfectly with Gene Roddenberry’s vision of a hopeful, dangerous, exciting, wonderful, eye-opening future for humanity and our adventures among the stars. I don’t normally let myself get this excited about a movie, because every time that happens I end up getting a Spider-Man 3. But I think this is the Star Trek that will show all the snobby critics, the naysayers who say that Trek is dead, and those simpering, irritating, mindless Lucasfilm Jedi fanboys why we Trekkies have stuck with the series for the last 40 years. I think this film will fucking deliver.

(found on scifi.com)

Ryder Is Spock’s Trek Mom

Winona Ryder has joined the cast of J.J. Abram’s upcoming Star Trek, playing the mother of young Spock (Zachary Quinto), Variety reported.

If Abrams’ Trek film follows the established mythology, Ryder would play Amanda, the human woman who marries Spock’s Vulcan father, Sarek. In the original series, Amanda was played by TV veteran Jane Wyatt.

The reimagined Star Trek is written by Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci and supposedly revolves around the early days of the crew of the U.S.S. Enterprise.

14> Harry earns spending money by selling Hermione’s panties on eBay.

13> Nobby has starred in several dragon-skin flicks under the name Rex Lizardtamer.

12> Dumbledore’s love-hate, life-and-death, soul-ripping torment was but a trifle when compared to Fluffy’s former crush on Michael Vick.

11> Mrs. Weasley sometimes needs to use the Memberus Rigido spell on Mr. Weasley.

10> Dobby? Straight!

9> Ollivander once got fired from a scoutmaster job for his creepy habit of “taking wand inventory.”

8> Let’s just say that a certain someone’s nickname in seventh year was “HerBIone.”

7> “The boy who lived” is actually short for “The boy who lived with a ball gag in his mouth during the summer breaks.”

6> Draco Malfoy once invited Ron Weasley to “slither in.”

5> A careful study of the spellbooks shows at least two spells that aren’t just English words with “us” tacked onto the end of them.

4> Neville, armed with his Nimbong 2000, was an avid purveyor of the “herbology dark arts.”

3> That’s a drunken Hermione sporting a wand and little else in “Wizards Gone Wild IV.”

2> Detention with McGonagall gets a lot more interesting when she skips the cat shtick and takes the form of Monica Bellucci.

1> Hagrid once ate a baby.

Danny Gallagher, McKinney, TX — 1 (19th #1)
Joseph Moore, Concord, CA — 2 (Hall of Famer)
Jim Rosenberg, Greensboro, NC — 3 (Hall of Famer)
Curtis Stoddard, Cedar Hills, UT — 3
Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA — 4, 8, 10 (Hat trick!/HoF)
Steve Huntington, San Jose, CA — 5
Bill Muse, Seattle, WA — 6 (Hall of Famer)
Lori Petterson, Fairfax, VA — 7
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 9 (Hall of Famer)
Brad Hamer, Austin, TX — 11
Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH — 12 (Hall of Famer)
Dave Goudsward, Lake Worth, FL — 13, 14
Donald Junter, New Haven, CT — Banner Tag
Chris White, Studio City, CA — List owner/editor
Buju Banton, Kingston, Jamaica — Ambience
Ambience explained: http://www.topfive.com/arcs_am/am110607.shtml

Here’s something extra special, “re: Your Brains” by Jonathan Coulton:

I don’t think you guys realize what Q goes through with that banner up there. I don’t know why, and apparently he doesn’t either, but getting that damn banner to act right is the biggest pain in the ass. I dread asking Q to change it, and I’m certain that he dreads it, too.

You’d think it would be no big deal. Its just a picture, right? Wrong. Changing that banner is like playing Jenga, and the banner is one of the blocks on the bottom. One false move and the whole thing falls down. Only instead of being harmless wooden blocks, they’re razor sharp samurai swords pointing straight down, dangling over newborn babies by hair thin threads. Also, the babies are highly explosive and nestled between easily broken pieces of life support equipment that is keeping your loved ones alive. And circling all around are rabid dingoes. You’ve always got to watch out for the dingoes…

My point is its a sensitive, bitchy process that is much more of a chore than it should be. So a big thanks to Q for getting it done for us time and again. I owe you another shot of 151, chief. Thanks for keeping us up and running.

OH, important safety tip: NEVER go swimming in Hong Kong Harbor:

Knight Scraps Hong Kong Scene

Producers of The Dark Knight, the next Batman movie, scrapped a scene in a Hong Kong harbor that would have had star Christian Bale jump out of a plane into the polluted water, the Agence France-Presse news service reported.

The scene, which would have been shot in Victoria Harbour, was canceled because producers felt the poor water quality was just too dangerous, according to a report drawn from the South China Morning Post newspaper.

Citing two unidentified production sources, the newspaper reported that the stunt had now been taken off the shooting list for The Dark Knight. A water sample reportedly revealed the presence of salmonella and tuberculosis, among other things.

I think part of the problem with many comic book movies is that they just put anyone who looks good into a role. That’s not good enough any more. There are a thousand guys of the appropriate age who could’ve played Magneto, and I mean guys that are really in shape. But can you imagine a better piece of casting than Ian McKellan? He’s a great fucking actor. He made you believe he was an incredibly dangerous man without being musclebound and perfectly toned. We need more of that in movies, and fewer fucking models that are told to repeat lines in the hope they they’ll look and sound good doing it.

I’m not saying he won’t get there eventually. Schwarzenegger was crap in pretty much all of his early roles, but in movies like Predator and True Lies he’s absolutely great. The Rock seems like a nice guy, and I’ve seen him be really, really funny in comedic and self deprecating roles, but I just don’t think he’s a good enough actor to make this work.