Comments on: Chris digs cheap Spider-Man stuff http://sci-fi-guys.com/2007/05/10/chris-digs-cheap-spider-man-stuff/ Get your geek on.™ Fri, 18 May 2012 14:26:26 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.1.3 By: Chris http://sci-fi-guys.com/2007/05/10/chris-digs-cheap-spider-man-stuff/comment-page-1/#comment-3710 Chris Fri, 11 May 2007 16:52:48 +0000 http://sci-fi-guys.com/2007/05/10/chris-digs-cheap-spider-man-stuff/#comment-3710 Hey, kids, some of you may already know this, but I write for <a href="http://www.topfive.com" target="_blank" rel="nofollow" rel="nofollow">TopFive.com</a>'s Sci-Fi list and Comics list. This is actually from the Movies list, so none of the entries are mine, but I thought it was perfect for Spider-Week, so I'm posting here (which I'm really not supposed to be doing). Hope you get a kick out of it. <div align="center">========================================= T H E T O P 5 L I S T This page left intentionally swank. ----------------------------------------------------- TopFive.com -- The Web's Best Original Humor ========================================= May 10, 2007 <strong>The Top 16 Surprises in "Spider-Man 3"</strong></div> 16> Spider-Man find himself facing his most dangerous foe yet: The Orkin Man! 15> Venom learns Spider-Man's true identity by hacking his MySpace page. 14> "Hello, my name ees New Goblin. You keeled my father. Prepare to diee." 13> Things were already weird enough when Tobey Maguire and Topher Grace were in the same scene, but once Elijah Wood showed up, matter and anti-matter collided and the movie ends in the destruction of the universe. 12> Kirsten Dunst portrays a terribly untalented actress -- and *still* can't pull it off. 11> Peter Parker picks a peck of pickled peppers. Previously, Peter partied with Parker Posey and Piper Perabo, then puked. 10> The Green Goblin shows his softer side with puppy-filled pumpkin bombs. 9> Peter smiles from ear to ear when Gwen Stacy tells him she likes to be tied up during sex. 8> After they finally make love, Mary Jane bites off Peter's head. 7> New below-the-belt web-spinning technique almost got the movie an NC-17 rating. 6> Spider-Man is reduced to tears by a scathing answering machine message from Alecbaldwin-Man. 5> The Sandman is 98 percent common beach sand and two percent discarded condoms. 4> Spidey finally enters the 21st century by discovering that great power can be had with no responsibility whatsoever. 3> A new villain is born when J. Jonah Jameson is bitten by a radioactive dung beetle. 2> The Sandman's plan to destroy Spider-Man involves a 10-foot wad of Charmin and a really, really big toilet. <div align="center">and Topfive.com's Number 1 Surprises in "Spider-Man 3"...</div> 1> Peter Parker lives up to his name when he falls asleep mid-coitus with Mary Jane. <div align="center">[ Copyright 2007 by Chris White/TopFive.com ] ========================================= The Runner Up and Honorable Mention submissions for today's list "Larval Comics" and "Arachnot!" are in our ClubTop5 version, along with much, MUCH more! Join today: http://www.topfive.com/html/ClubTop5.shtml ========================================= Rumination of the Day I have only one question about the Kyoto Accord: How many miles per gallon does it get? (Alan Selk) To subscribe to Ruminations: ruminations-subscribe@topica.com =========================================</div> Selected from 94 submissions from 36 contributors. Today's Top 5 List authors are: ----------------------------------------------------- Gretchen Koch, Brookfield, IL -- 1, 3, 13 (3rd #1/Hat trick!) Richard Skora, Columbus, OH -- 2 Steve Huntington, San Jose, CA -- 3, 14 Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- 4 (Hall of Famer) Chuck Smith, Woodbridge, VA -- 5 (Hall of Famer) John J. Brassil, Nashville, TN -- 6 Bruce W. Alter, Fairfax Station, VA -- 7 Kevin Freels, Walnut Creek, CA -- 7 (Hall of Famer) Mitch Patterson, Atlanta, GA -- 7 Larry Baum, Hong Kong -- 8 David Kass, Queens, NY -- 8 (Hall of Famer) David Zechiel, Lake Forest, CA -- 9 Travis Ruetenik, Hiroshima, Japan -- 10 Ellen Satter, Trumbull, CT -- 11 Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- 11, Topic Greg Preece, Toronto, Canada -- 12 Marsha Clodfelter, Corpus Christi, TX -- 15 (Hall of Famer) Lori Petterson, Fairfax, VA -- 16 Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH -- Banner Tag (Hall of Famer) Chris White, Studio City, CA -- List owner/editor David Bowie, Brixton, England -- Ambience Ambience explained: http://www.topfive.com/arcs_am/am051007.shtml ========================================= Copyright 2007 by Chris White All rights reserved. Do not publish or broadcast without permission. ----------------------------------------------------- To subscribe: http://www.topfive.com/subscribe.shtml To unsubscribe: Click on the link at the bottom of this message. Address changes? Problems? General bitching? Lonely? Let us know: http://www.topfive.com/contact.shtml ----------------------------------------------------- T H E T O P 5 L I S T http://www.topfive.com ========================================= Hey, kids, some of you may already know this, but I write for TopFive.com‘s Sci-Fi list and Comics list. This is actually from the Movies list, so none of the entries are mine, but I thought it was perfect for Spider-Week, so I’m posting here (which I’m really not supposed to be doing). Hope you get a kick out of it.

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T H E T O P 5 L I S T
This page left intentionally swank.
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TopFive.com — The Web’s Best Original Humor
=========================================

May 10, 2007

The Top 16 Surprises in “Spider-Man 3″

16> Spider-Man find himself facing his most dangerous foe yet: The Orkin Man!

15> Venom learns Spider-Man’s true identity by hacking his MySpace page.

14> “Hello, my name ees New Goblin. You keeled my father. Prepare to diee.”

13> Things were already weird enough when Tobey Maguire and Topher Grace were in the same scene, but once Elijah Wood showed up, matter and anti-matter collided and the movie ends in the destruction of the universe.

12> Kirsten Dunst portrays a terribly untalented actress — and *still* can’t pull it off.

11> Peter Parker picks a peck of pickled peppers. Previously, Peter partied with Parker Posey and Piper Perabo, then puked.

10> The Green Goblin shows his softer side with puppy-filled pumpkin bombs.

9> Peter smiles from ear to ear when Gwen Stacy tells him she likes to be tied up during sex.

8> After they finally make love, Mary Jane bites off Peter’s head.

7> New below-the-belt web-spinning technique almost got the movie an NC-17 rating.

6> Spider-Man is reduced to tears by a scathing answering machine message from Alecbaldwin-Man.

5> The Sandman is 98 percent common beach sand and two percent discarded condoms.

4> Spidey finally enters the 21st century by discovering that great power can be had with no responsibility whatsoever.

3> A new villain is born when J. Jonah Jameson is bitten by a radioactive dung beetle.

2> The Sandman’s plan to destroy Spider-Man involves a 10-foot wad of Charmin and a really, really big toilet.

and Topfive.com’s Number 1 Surprises in “Spider-Man 3″…

1> Peter Parker lives up to his name when he falls asleep mid-coitus with Mary Jane.

[ Copyright 2007 by Chris White/TopFive.com ]

=========================================
The Runner Up and Honorable Mention submissions for today’s list
“Larval Comics” and “Arachnot!”
are in our ClubTop5 version, along with much, MUCH more!
Join today: http://www.topfive.com/html/ClubTop5.shtml
=========================================
Rumination of the Day

I have only one question about the Kyoto Accord:
How many miles per gallon does it get?

(Alan Selk)

To subscribe to Ruminations: ruminations-subscribe@topica.com

=========================================

Selected from 94 submissions from 36 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:
—————————————————–
Gretchen Koch, Brookfield, IL — 1, 3, 13 (3rd #1/Hat trick!)
Richard Skora, Columbus, OH — 2
Steve Huntington, San Jose, CA — 3, 14
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 4 (Hall of Famer)
Chuck Smith, Woodbridge, VA — 5 (Hall of Famer)
John J. Brassil, Nashville, TN — 6
Bruce W. Alter, Fairfax Station, VA — 7
Kevin Freels, Walnut Creek, CA — 7 (Hall of Famer)
Mitch Patterson, Atlanta, GA — 7
Larry Baum, Hong Kong — 8
David Kass, Queens, NY — 8 (Hall of Famer)
David Zechiel, Lake Forest, CA — 9
Travis Ruetenik, Hiroshima, Japan — 10
Ellen Satter, Trumbull, CT — 11
Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ — 11, Topic
Greg Preece, Toronto, Canada — 12
Marsha Clodfelter, Corpus Christi, TX — 15 (Hall of Famer)
Lori Petterson, Fairfax, VA — 16
Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH — Banner Tag (Hall of Famer)
Chris White, Studio City, CA — List owner/editor
David Bowie, Brixton, England — Ambience
Ambience explained: http://www.topfive.com/arcs_am/am051007.shtml

=========================================
Copyright 2007 by Chris White All rights reserved.
Do not publish or broadcast without permission.
—————————————————–
To subscribe: http://www.topfive.com/subscribe.shtml
To unsubscribe: Click on the link at the bottom of this message.
Address changes? Problems? General bitching? Lonely?
Let us know: http://www.topfive.com/contact.shtml
—————————————————–
T H E T O P 5 L I S T
http://www.topfive.com
=========================================

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